Monday, May 4, 2009

Haiku Feedback

Hey, my chickadees!

Submit your haiku feedback under this post. Let's keep 'em separate from the haikus themselves. Make sure your feedback discusses one (or both) of the following:
-- the specific parts of the haiku you like, and why
-- suggestions for improvement

Your comments should be thoughtful and complex. The grade you earn will be determined by how well you follow these directions.

Finally, don't forget to:
1) Indicate the name of the person to whom you are responding
2) Sign your name at the end of your comment

18 comments:

  1. I am loving the stuff I see so far at this site, and especially the haiku by Kaycee, Jas, Megan and Mrs. Carr, because they do what haiku are particularly meant to do: express something poignantly true via nature...Nice work!

    --Mrs. C

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  2. Brody,
    Your poem is realy cool. When i read it i thought it was funny.Really good job.

    Joshua

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  3. @Carson
    I really liked your haiku. I thought it was great how you used "Refrigerator" as your last line. You may want to check your spelling a bit more carefully. Better spelling would make your poem more readable and more funny.
    -Jas

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  4. Melissa,
    I really liked you poem, the best line I think, was the end.
    "I realize I have nothing to find"
    It says it is all inside yourself, That is the only true answer to life. Very nice.
    -Cheyanne

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  5. brody,
    I like your haiku because it is funny and reminds me of quest and sleeping in the tent.

    ~andy~

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  6. keely,
    I like your haiku it is so deep.Some day I hope that I can write that deep.

    ~andy~

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  7. Brody,
    Haha i liked your poem. It made me laugh. Good job :) But maybe next time for your haiku put a little more meaning or something to it.

    -Kaitlin :D

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  8. keely your haiku is great its deep and a lot of people can find some way to relate to it, great job keep it up

    ~Allison

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  9. jas,
    your haiku is great it makes such a pretty picture come into my head and its about something that just about everyone has seen. i love it.

    ~Allison

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  10. Andy,
    your poem was good but i thought that is was jumpy at times and you need to work on your spelling other then those two things it was good

    BRODY

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  11. Kaycee,
    I thought that yours was very amusing and well written.

    BRODY

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  12. Allison, I love the last one you posted. When I read it I imagined a couple laying on the beach when the sun was going down. And it reminded me of the song Your Ex-Lover Is Dead by Stars.
    Go listen!

    Jenn!

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  13. Andy,

    I really liked your poem because I love winter its just so pretty. Also next time make sure that you spell snow right and please, also instead of you using cold twice you should try to use a diffrent word for winter



    Tory

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  14. Joe,
    I really liked your peom because I believe a lot in friendship too. But I think you should have used two other words than friend maybe like buddy or pal.


    Tory

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  15. Carson, your's doesn't make much sense. But it made me laugh. You should really try to work hard and find a topic you can stick with.
    Allison, I really like your's becuase i can relate to them.

    Keely (:

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  16. I really like Kaycee's haiku. I feel the same way about the sun.
    It makes me smile a lot.

    Melissa

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  17. tory, I liked your poem because I play hockey to and we are tough. But your second line has to many syllables

    -carson

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  18. ~Keely
    I really enjoyed yours. It was quite emotional, I thought. Your a pro at this.
    ~Carson
    Yours was quite random, but it was funny and when i read it i knew right away it was you.
    ~Mrs. Carr
    I enjoyed yours because it helped me decide which haiku to type. And thanks for the comment.
    ~Andy
    Yours was great, except for that misspelled snow.
    ~Tessa
    You misspelled the word coming. You spelled it COMMING. It's really spelled COMING.

    -Megan

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